Starting Fresh

Please excuse my long absence. The last few months have been rough, and I have had a bad attitude, and none of that translates well to a nice blog post.

However, I have decided that if I can't immediately change my circumstances I had better learn to be content with them, and to be happy and hopeful. My energy would be better spent doing uplifting things, working hard, and coming up with solutions to the problems that I like to pout about so much. 

I know I have said this before. But I am going to work on up-keeping his blog instead of wasting so much time on Facebook. I know Facebook has good things about it and I won't quit it entirely. But I do think it promotes time-wasting and obsession over un-important things. 

Then there is my blog. My blog makes me happy. I feel like it is worthwhile. I take more effort to keep it pretty and to present my life in a way that is worthy of it, instead of throwing it into random little posts and statuses. And I think it is a better opportunity to keep a record and create a story out of my life. So, here I go again. :)

I found out I was pregnant with baby number one back in March. Since then I have had a lot of overwhelming feelings. I have always wanted to be a mother, and I feel excited and blessed to have this child become part of my life. I can't wait! I am about 20 weeks along, and am due on November 24th. 
This ultrasound pic was at about 13 weeks. 

We enjoyed a trip to San Clemente CA last week. We had stressful car trouble (which is thankfully now taken care of) and it's not the nicest drive for a road trip. But I do love to travel. I love the feeling of exploring new places and seeing the way that other people live. This was my first time seeing the ocean up  close, and it sure is beautiful.

Hard times can make us stronger or they can break us down. It depends upon how we respond to them. While I do sometimes have days where I feel I am breaking, I know that overall I am becoming stronger. While I don't feel like I am there right now, what I am going through is refining me, and in the long run I will be better for it. And above all, I feel like I have grown closer to Jordon. I know that I love him even more than I did on the day we were married, and we have plenty of time and opportunities to strengthen that even more. Forever in fact! 

And right now I am feeling so grateful for all the opportunities and support that has been given to us. Sometimes I am short-sighted, and it's so hard to wait. Sometimes I don't see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes I feel like I will never get where I am trying to go. I suppose the Lord is trying to teach me  to have more patience and more trust. When I rely more on the Lord he helps to keep my vision clear. Right now I do see the light. And I am so excited to get there. But I know that it's all in the journey, and as soon as I reach that spot I will have to find the next one. More than anything I am excited for that journey.