15 DAYS!!!!!

     I am getting married in 15 days. Two weeks from tomorrow. I can't even tell you how excited I am! It's gotten to the point where I am a little overwhelmed that things pretty much need to be finished, but also where I am just so ready for it to finally get here and happen that I just think however things work out is good enough to me.

     I got temple reccommend signed by the Stake President today. I was nervous before the interview, but talking to him made me feel really good, and even more excited to go to the temple than I already was. It also calmed some of the "maybe I'm not ready" nerves. Just to make it clear though, I am ready. And so happy.

     Now this is going to seem like I change in subject but just stay with me and you'll get it (hopefully). Jordon and I watched Season of the Witch the other night. His choice not mine. It was a creepy, gross, depressing movie. Lots of grim lighting and corrupted priests, and black plague. And of course witches. And it got me thinking a lot about the witch trials, which got me thinking about the dark ages, which got me thinking about the Apostasy. The movie is obviously a graphic and dramatic and unrealistic depiction of it all, but really it got me thinking about how happy I am to be born in this time instead of that one, and with the knowledge of Christ and His church.

     The Stake President talked to me about the detail and beauty of the temple. And then reminded me that the real beauty of the temple is that all of the priesthood keys have been restored, and in the temple we are able to receive the blessings from them. Life is so confusing, I don't know what I would do without the anchor of my Heavenly Father and the gospel. I love feeling the Spirit, and I never want to lose that.

     I hope no ones thinks it inappropriate of me to draw spiritual conclusions off of a PG-13 thriller/sci-fi movie. :) But this is my blog, and I am being honest.

     Can't wait for those 15 days to be over! But don't worry, I will wait. ;)  :D

The Date is Set.

     Hello everyone. :) I just wanted to give you an update. Jordon and I will be married in the Jordan River Temple on March 9, 2012. I have made a checklist of wedding planning things that need to be done. There are tons of things on the list, and comparatively only a few that have gotten done so far. I am probably going dress shopping(!) soon, and I will definitely give you an update on that.

     And in case you are wondering, I have chosen my wedding colors. :) Jordon told me that 2 is the right number, and I told him I was going to pick 6. Haha. Actually my intention was to choose 3, but I chose 4. I spent so much time looking at pictures online, and arranging paint swatches; trying to chose the 3 that I loved most and that went perfectly together. But no matter what I came up with I just wasn't satisfied. So I chose 4. I am perfectly happy with the decision too so it must be right.

     I have chosen: Navy blue, Light rosy pink, Banana yellow, and Orange.  Kind of like this. Only with blue instead of purple.

http://lds.org/church/temples/jordan-river-utah?lang=eng#tab=address

   

Engaged!

     Hello everyone. :) For those of you who don't already know I have a special announcement to make. . . I am getting married! Yeah I know, it feels a little unreal to me. :) But I am so excited! 

     I want everyone to understand that Jordon is very worthy and willing to serve the Lord, but he has run into complications and will not be serving a full time mission. He is an amazing person though, and will find ways of serving God and sharing the gospel wherever he is. He loves God and loves the gospel and loves to share that with others.

     So far the date we are thinking of is February 10th. That's a little bit soon, but it seems like a good day for us. Yay for a Winter wedding! Definitely not what I have been dreaming of since I was little (I always wanted Fall or Spring), but the idea of it is actually really starting to grow on me. The temple we have chosen is the Jordan River Temple. His parents were married there and we both think it is beautiful. 

      We chose our rings together. Mine is yellow gold with a natural ruby (his birthstone) and two diamonds. His is a band of solid 14k gold.

     Not very trendy at all, and the ruby is nontraditional. The design of the ring is classic though and it is beautiful. :) I think it fits my personality very well. Isn't it pretty?!

  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3  <3

Fireside - Elder Holland

     This weekend I had the delightful opportunity to hear Elder Jeffery R. Holland speak! Yes, he came in person to our small town, and I was so excited by it. They held a YSA (young single adult) fireside with him as the key speaker. I went to Jordon's after work, and hadn't realized the fireside was Saturday. Because I didn't have any appropriate clothes with me Jordon assumed I would just go home when the time came. But I wanted to stay and go to the fireside! So we went to Walmart and I quickly picked out an entire fireside-appropriate outfit. The only modest skirt I could see, a plain pink top, a slip (because the skirt was a bit thin) and the only decent looking/not-too-expensive shoes I could find.

     It was definitely worth it. I felt the spirit SO strongly. I don't imagine that anyone there didn't. We (Jordon, his cousin Dallon and I) got there an hour early and picked a bench three rows away from the pulpit. Each of us thought that he looked directly into our eyes at some point. Personally I am sure he did more than once. Everyone felt like he was talking to them. I felt like crying multiple times, but managed to keep it in. At the end of the meeting we talked about it, and it's clear that everyone was greatly edified and thoroughly uplifted.

     There is no way I can tell everything that he said, and what I will say will not leave near the impression that hearing it from him would. He was humorous in a way you don't see in conference, and also VERY powerful and almost harsh at times. He even slammed his fist down once. But I will say a few things. [And very unfortunately I did not have a notebook! When I got home I wrote down what I could remember. Luckily almost everything he said was so striking that it sunk in pretty well]. So here it goes. Not really in the order he said it, but in consistence with my own line of thought.

**********

      He quoted Virgil, and said it more than once, wanting us all to memorize the line."Endure, and save yourself for days of happiness ahead." He spoke a great deal about trials and pain, and about how why in spite of this we should be happy. He very forcefully told us that we are not ever allowed to think, when going through trials, that God does not love us. Coming from him that way I don't think I will ever dare to now! ALL of the prophets have suffered. Many of them suffered huge pain and trials that we will never come near to. The Savior himself suffered more greatly than any of us can come the tiniest bit close to imagining. Suffering is part of the law of sacrifice. We don't offer up lambs anymore obviously. Instead we have been commanded to offer a "broken heart and contrite spirit".

     All of our pain and our sorrow is part of the redemption process. And when we feel that we are broken, that our hearts are broken, we need to offer them up to the Lord. We need to go to the Lord and put our trust completely in Him (Proverbs 3:5-6. He said President Monson mentions this scripture very often). And when we offer our broken hearts to the Lord He will give them back to us whole and perfect. Just as the Savior in His resurrection. Elder Holland told us that the Savior literally died of a broken heart. I think I already knew this, but it never really stuck. As he told us about this it was one of the moments where I could barely keep tears from slipping out. It is so beautifully sad and painful to me, to know that my Savior died of a broken heart, after bearing the burden of my pain and sins, and the pain and sins of all those I love.

     He stressed that we should never despair if we feel broken and imperfect. God loves broken things. No matter how broken you think you are. Can anyone who understands the atonement (as much as humans can understand) really despair? Is Christ's perfect sacrifice not enough to save us all? The Lord already knows what we are. Every imperfection and lingering pain or regret. He has felt it. And still He has told us that through Him we will be saved if we endure, and remain faithful. And He has promised us that, even though there are times when it doesn't seem possible to us, if we are faithful He will shape us to carry whatever load we are given. And we will be happy. Why do we ever doubt ourselves? We are God's children! He has told us that He will qualify us, and that should be enough for us. We don't have any reason to be afraid.
     Elder Holland talked about when Jesus calmed the sea. He was sleeping through a storm that was so bad even expert fishermen were afraid for their lives. He must have been so tired. And after he rebuked the sea, he also rebuked the disciples. How could they think they would drown with the Savior there to protect them? He would never have let them perish and they should have known it. They should have been able to lie down and sleep next to him, and know that all would be well.

     He has the power to control wind and waves. He certainly can take care of us. 

**********

Those are the main things I took away from it. He also told us in no uncertain terms that we need to be adults. And that if any of us are on the fence about something that we know we need to do, to just suck it up, quit being afraid, and do it. Missions, marriage, children, or whatever the choice is at our stage of life.

     I wish I could completely share the entire experience with all of you, and have you feel what I felt. I want everyone to know what I know from it. I am sorry I fail to communicate effectively. I feel so blessed to have heard from an apostle of the Lord, and I want everyone to feel that blessing. But I can't give away experiences. All I can say is, make sure you are prepared to feel the Spirit at this upcoming conference, and NEVER pass up an opportunity to hear from a living prophet seer and revelator. 

<3 Tiffany Alaine



PS I was also lucky enough to hear from him again today at a Stake Conference. Perhaps later I will share some thoughts from that. I could listen to that man speak all day long.

Alma 47, 48 & 49

(I decided to split my post in to two halves. So here is the second. See last post for the entire thing. Or don't, because each half stands fine on it's own.

****************

     Now I am just going to share some thoughts from what I read today. I had a lot of thoughts, but there are only a couple particular ones that I want to share.

     Alma 47. Amalickiah, the very wicked ex-Nephite (right?) is very sneakely getting control of the Lamanite kingdom.

• The first obvious lesson from this chapter is, that evil is very persistent. We must always be on our guard, and pray for strength to fight it. 
• And the devil "poisons by degrees" (vs 18). He is subtle. He is like Amalickah. He flatters, he lies, he tries the same thing over and over until you break, he acts like he's your friend when he is your enemy. In short, he is very dangerous.

•      In order to be safe from him, we must do as Moroni did in chapters 48 and 49. We need to fortify! Build walls, dig trenches, send backup to the weakest areas. OR pray and read scriptures, go to church and write a journal, work on talents you do have and ask the Lord to help you develop the spiritual gifts that you want/need but don't have. 

     One more thought. In 47:6 and in 49:13 it mentions something about the determination of the Lamanties. But each time it is for a very different reason. In the first the were determined that they would not be forced to go against the Nephites, and in the second the were determined that they would destroy the city of Noah and the Nephites there.
     There is something interesting there about human nature. Humans tend to be very stubborn. We think we know what we want and then basically swear to die before ever changing our minds.

• However #1, if you let him Satan can sway even the most determined into doing exactly the opposite of what they had intended.

• And #2, you can be determined for good or for evil and it is completely your choice. But you had better know why you are so determined and think about the consequences, both good and bad. Remember to be humble and willing to let God strengthen you when you are right and teach and correct you when you are wrong or do not fully understand.

     Well I hope I have effectively communicated what I have meant to. Enjoy my novel and have a wonderful day! Whether you already are or you aren't, go pray and read your scriptures and I promise it will be better. :)

I (heart) the scriptures.

     The scriptures are amazing. On days when I feel like despairing there is nothing that is better for me than deciding to read my scriptures.
     On such days I will usually sit there with the book in my lap for some minutes before actually opening it to read. It's like if I open it I am resolving to try and be better and happier; and that takes some effort when in a miserable state of mind. After I finally open it I at first read a bit halfheartedly and don't fully understand anything I am reading. Especially if it has been a while since I have read.

     However, after about ten minutes something miraculous happens. Even if the words still aren't completely sinking in, I suddenly feel at peace. Even on the days when I think it is impossible to feel that peace, I feel it. As soon as this dawns on me I start putting in a little more effort. I pull out a scripture marker, and maybe even a notebook. After about twenty-five minutes or more I am actually enjoying what I read. I am marking things, writing notes, and drawing parallels all over the place. And when I am done I don't just feel peaceful, I feel refreshed and strengthened. 

     I don't mean to make is sound like reading the scriptures is always a struggle for me. On happier days it comes easy and just fills me to the brim. On hard days it does take more effort. When you are not feeling spiritual then trying to do anything that is spiritual always takes effort. You have to convert yourself from one mindset to the other. From worldly cares to higher thoughts. And when you are willing to show the Lord that you are trying then He will open up to you and give you more than you imagined you could even receive.
     Oh yes, and no matter what mood I am in I always pray before I read my scriptures. Whether it is long or short I know it helps. Because of course they go hand in hand. I pray for understanding and a desire to read and learn, and to love the scriptures.

     What I am trying to say is: The scriptures are amazing. And I don't know why I ever have to think twice before turning to them. Human weakness really doesn't make any sense.


<3 Tiffany Alaine

To be continued in next post.

Unleashing the Dormant Spirit

      I'm pretty sure I have posted this before. But it was quite a while ago, and it's worth posting again. I also have a link to it at the very top of my side bar. This is so beautiful to me. It's comforting and peaceful.

But with Joy, Wend your Way . . .

First of all I have to say, I finally passed my class! I have been struggling with this one for a while. I turned in the essay thinking it was not complete, but that I would just see what they said. Then I looked at the evaluation and was happily shocked to see it had passed! It was my final task, so now I'm done with that cursed class! I can't even explain how relieved this makes me!

Mostly I wanted to share this little experience. For the last while I have been stressing about things more than I usually do. About the above class, as well as other things. It gets to be a little oppressive sometimes. I like to think I am a pretty optimistic person, but of course life gets hard sometimes. So, yesterday when I was driving home from Utah County with my parents I started singing to myself. I don't know why. It wasn't a conscious choice. I was singing the hymn "Come, Come Ye Saints". At first I wasn't thinking much about it. But I enjoy singing, so I kept going. When the first verse was done I couldn't think of the next one, and for a second I tried to think of another hymn, but I couldn't. So I just kept singing the first verse to "Come, Come Ye Saints." After the second time I started paying attention to the words, and it struck me that they were just the ones I needed. I had been stressing out, but then I was watching the beautiful mountains fly by, and suddenly this song came to me.

Come, come, ye saints, no toil nor labor fear;
But with joy, wend your way.
Though hard to you this journey may appear,
Grace shall be as your day.
'Tis better far for us to strive
Our useless cares from us to drive;
Do this, and joy your hearts will swell
All is well! All is well!

This was exactly what I needed. Sure life gets hard, but if I joyfully "wend my way" then my "heart will swell", and I'll know that everything is ok. Oh yes, and I can't forget "no toil nor labor fear." I can't be afraid to work. Because no matter how cheerful I try to be, if I'm afraid to work for what I need then my problems aren't going to go away on their own.
 Also, I think that there was a reason I couldn't think of another verse to this song, because I can always think of at least one other verse to songs I know as well as this one.
  
I know without a doubt that the Lord put this verse of this song in my head. This is what I needed to hear. Nothing more and nothing less. Thinking about it makes me feel so much more peaceful.

I love that music can be such an unparalleled tool for the Spirit to communicate to us through. I have always loved hymns. It's like singing scripture, or a prayer. They combine the beauty of music with words inspired by Christ.

Which reminds me of one of my favorite mastery scriptures: D&C 25:12 "For my soul ^adelighteth in the ^bsong of the ^cheart; yea, the ^dsong of the righteous is a prayer unto me, and it shall be answered with a blessing upon their heads."


PS. Go check out my mom's blog. Her latest post goes along really well with this subject.: http://sondraslife.blogspot.com/2011/02/today.html

Christmas is coming!

     Hurray! It's always hard for me to believe when December actually comes around. And I'm always excited for it. Burdens don't seem so hard to bare in December. In fact this is the season when we take on hectic responsibilities because we want to. It's to make the holiday better! Decorating, looking for gifts, making treats . . .   I am working on making homemade Christmas gifts for my family, which I try to do every year. It's one of my favorite parts of Christmas. Gifts that you carefully think out and make yourself are just special. I think that making them does more for me than it does for the people I give them too. But I want to please the receiver as well, so I hope that everything turns out nicely this year. I do have some good ideas. I will take pictures as I go along and post them after Christmas.
     I can't say a single thing about my gift(s) to Jordon, because I don't want him getting even tiny hints. And you never know, he might decide to read my blog one day.

     I went with his family to get a Christmas tree on Sunday. We use a fake tree and I have never done that before, so it was fun. The snow was pretty deep in some places, as we trudged through it in search of a suitable tree. It was kind of tiring for my legs! I wasn't cold, even though my feet were pretty wet by the end. It was a beautiful day. After the first attempt failed and we came back to the vehicles I got a nice hot cup of coco before continuing to the next spot. I had to go extra slow through the deep spots so that I didn't spill, but it made walking much more pleasant. When the tree was selected, chopped down, and hauled back everyone had some coco and donuts before we headed back to town.
     Once we were back we watched the first presidencies Christmas devotional, then ate dinner. After that we decorated the tree while eating oreo truffles that Jordon's sister made (which my mom introduced to them last year). It was a good day. :)

     If you haven't watched the devotional yet then you need to! Yes, that's an order. :) Just kidding, but you really really should. I watched it again at home for FHE because my family missed it and mom wanted to see it. We watched it on her computer. I can't pick favorites of course and it was all good, but I loved President Uchtdorf's talk, as usual. He has such a wonderful style. I don't think I've ever heard a general authority use the story of the Grinch. The German accent makes it better as well. And I enjoyed the music more than usual.
     Go watch the 2010 First Presidency Christmas Devotional!

   

Enduring Faith in Christ

Yes, I have been getting a lot out of my scriptures the last few days. I am close to the end of the B.O.M right now (and towards the end of the OT in the Bible). Anyways, I just wanted to share a lovely verse I found. :)
I was reading in Moroni, chapters 1,2, and 3. There is really quite a lot in these little chapters if you look for it, but I will share just a little bit of what I got from it.
I really liked 3:3 " . . . I ordain you to be a teacher, to preach repentance and remission of sins through Jesus Christ, by the endurance of faith on his name to the end. Amen." First of all, it is a good scripture about the priesthood and teaching. But what I like most about it is that it gives a nice view of repentance. "remission of sins through Jesus Christ, by the endurance of faith on his name to the end." Obviously repentance comes through Christ, but also through faith on him! And to the end!
So basically, for a remission of sins we need an enduring faith in Christ.

If we believe in God it gives us a hope of better things, hope comes of faith, faith gives us a trust in the Lord, this trust casts out fear and dismay by increasing our faith, and this leads to happiness and a "rest of the Lord"! These are my thoughts all put together after reading a bunch of verses. Those verses are - Moroni 3:3, Ether 12:4, Proverbs 3:5&6, Joshua 1:9, Alma 32:21, D&C 123:17, Isaiah 41:10, Moroni 7:3, and the memory of a talk by president Uchtdorf and plenty of scriptures that make it clear to me that faith and fear can not exist together. Including, Matt 8:26, Mark 4:40, Moroni 8:16
If you need some spiritual uplifting I would recommend reading those scriptures.

One last thing! I promise it will be short!
Moroni 6:4 " . . . keep them continually watchful unto prayer, relying alone upon the merits of Christ, who is the author and finisher of their faith." Christ is the source of our faith, and it can only endure through him. What else can we rely on in this ever-changing world? We can only rely on the gospel.

Our Refined Heavenly Home

I just wanted to tell everyone to read this. It is absolutely wonderful and so worth your time! I don't know what we would do without prophets to remind us of these things. We would be so lost.

Our Refined Heavenly Home

Do not limit yourselves

"I wonder if you sisters fully understand the greatness of your gifts and talents and how all of you can achieve the 'highest place of honor' in the Church and in the world. One of your unique, precious, and sublime gifts is your femininity, with its natural grace, goodness, and divinity. Femininity is not just lipstick, stylish hairdos, and trendy clothes. It is the divine adornment of humanity. It finds expression in your qualities of your capacity to love, your spirituality, delicacy, radiance, sensitivity, creativity, charm, graciousness, gentleness, dignity, and quiet strength. It is manifest differently in each girl or woman, but each of you possesses it. Femininity is part of your inner beauty.

"One of your particular gifts is your feminine intuition. Do not limit yourselves. As you seek to know the will of our Heavenly Father in your life and become more spiritual, you will be far more attractive, even irresistible. You can use your smiling loveliness to bless those you love and all you meet, and spread great joy. Femininity is part of the God-given divinity within each of you. It is your incomparable power and influence to do good. You can, through your supernal gifts, bless the lives of children, women, and men. Be proud of your womanhood. Enhance it. Use it to serve others."

"Womanhood: The Highest Place of Honor," Ensign, May 2000, 96

Read this - - -

"If ever you are tempted to become discouraged or to lose faith, remember those faithful saints who remained true in Kirtland. Hold on a little longer.

You can do this!

You are part of a special generation. You were prepared and preserved to live at this important time in the existence of our beautiful planet earth. You have a Celestial pedigree and therefore have all the necessary talents to make your life an eternal success story. The Lord has blessed you with a testimony of the truth . . . You have felt His influence and witnessed His power. And if you continue to seek Him, He will continue to grant you sacred experiences. It may be hard to see that at times, but hold on a little longer, for "eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the hearts of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him and wait for him."

1 Corinthians 2:9

president Deiter F. Uchtdorf

D.O.T.S!

I went to relief society for the first time today. It was a little weird. But the ladies are nice, even if they aren't anything close to my age, and it is nice to know that we always have the gospel in common, if nothing else. We were given a bookmark and a little baggie of Dots candies (which I love by the way), and reminded to Depend On The Savior. :) I thought that was really cute. And now I have another reason to love one of my favorite candies.

Just one more thing that I wanted to share. This is something I heard at Stake Conference a few week ago. I don't really know where it originally came from, but I like it:)

The Fellowship of the Unashamed

I am part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit's power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made -- I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, and my future is secure. I am finished and done with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless plans, chintzy living, and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need pre-eminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk by patience, lift by prayer, and labor with power. My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my way is narrow, my way rough, my companion few, my Guide reliable, my mission clear. I can not be bought, compromised, detoured lured away, turned back, diluted or delayed.

I will not flinch in the face of sacrifices, hesitate in the presence of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity. I won't give up, shut up, let up, until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached up for the cause of Christ.

I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I must go till He comes, give till I drop, preach till all know, and work until He stops me. And, when He comes for His Own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My banner will be clear.

Romans 1:16

Oh yeah, and, my wonderful friend Nannie (yes, that's the gorgeous girl in the picture above) is GONE!!! :( I will miss her. But I am happy for her.

Seminary Graduation

Hey all! Yesterday was the last day of school for me and all of my senior friends. Yay! I signed a bunch of yearbooks, and then Preston and Kenzie and Jordon and I all stayed out late and watched a movie at Jordon's house. :)

With graduation comes also - Seminary Graduation! Yep! After four years of it I am finished! Seminary Graduation for the three combined stakes in my area is on May 16, (Sunday) 2010 at six pm. I will be speaking (for about three minutes, along with probably almost everyone else) and Jordon is playing a piano solo. Haha, hopefully he has it down by then because he didn't have much time to practice. So to all of my friends and family all of you please feel free to come! There will be refreshments after the program. :) If you are interested let me know.
<3 Tiff

Changes

Yesterday I was kind of stressing out a little bit. I have known for a long time that things are changing. And thinking about it all usually excites me. I am an optimistic person, and I usually see the happy side of things. But yesterday it all hit me in a different way.

One of my best friends moved out of her parents house before Easter. She in now leaving around Salt Lake area with her grandma. She is working, is dating an RM, and having a little but of a hard time adjusting. I love her and I MISS her!

My other best friend is going to BYU Hawaii in the Fall. I am SO glad that her plan to leave and start working right after school is not happening. Haha, for my own self at least. I would hate for her to leave sooner than she has to.

Some of my guy friends are thinking about their missions, and it is crazy to think about how soon they will actually be gone! Some of them already are gone. :( It is a wonderful thing of course, but also a sad thing.

And my boy will be nineteen next summer!!! I am so extremely excited for this! And yet I will be so completely sad without him!

So everything is changing. Not for the worse, in fact I think that it is all for the better. But still, I feel a little overwhelmed by it all. I am eighteen. I have been for a few months. I am receiving my YW Recognition this Sunday, which I have been working toward for SO long! I will then soon have to start going to Relief Society. :/ No offence meant to all of the wonderful women who belong to that organization. But most of the women in my ward are old, or in a calling in one of the other organizations. And yet i don't want to stay where I am either. My friend and I have talked about going to the college ward together for the summer, but that probably won't won't happen.

I have to find a job now. I need one so bad right now. I need to save up for my travels, as well as some personal things that I need. I just can't wait to get out of this in-between stage. I don't like it.

So, last night I played some hymns on the piano. Some of my favorites, like 'I Believe in Christ,' 'I Stand All Amazed', 'Where Can I Turn for Peace,' 'Be Still My Soul,' and 'I am a child of God.' They comforted me, and were a good reminder that no matter how much and how many things change, the Lord will never change. He and His Gospel are constant and solid. Then I talked to Jordon on the phone before I went to bed. He reminded me that no matter what I will never be completely on my own. No matter how many friends go away, I will still have my family (haha), and I will always have God. He told me to just make the most of everything as it happens. He also told me to stop being ridiculous and to cheer up because being a teenager isn't that wonderful and there are many better things ahead. Haha, he is right, and I didn't have an argument against that.
And ultimately I do know that I am really excited and happy about all of the changes. As much as I will miss my friends I am happy for them and their adventures. And for my own as well. Life is, for the most part, good. And I really am ready for whatever lies ahead. I just have to have a little melt down once in a while to remind me of it all, and to make sure I don't explode under all of the pressure.

Well I don't know how much sense any of that made. But I fell better! :D :) And the sunshine makes me happy!

Happy Valentines Day!

It is a beautiful day today! It almost feels like spring! I really can't wait until it's warm enough for me to completely ditch my puffy winter coat.
Yesterday the youth in my ward went to the temple to do baptisms. It's was great of course. It's always a wonderful experience. I especially like to watch some of the younger kids who have never done it, or who haven't done it much. Hehe, I remember my first time. I felt nervous, and paid attention to every single detail, hoping I wouldn't mess anything up. Now I just relax, think of the work that is being done, have a good time with the other teens, and enjoy it. The Manti temple is SO beautiful! Not that all of them aren't. But that is my favorite one.
Then when we got home at about eight, I put on some jeans and headed out the door again. I went to Jordon's house to celebrate the holiday. Jordon's best friend and his girlfriend (who are both my friends too of course) came over too. The boys made us hamburgers and curly fries. After we ate we watched Night at the Museum 2.
And . . . . Jordon gave me these beautiful roses! They are orange because that's my favorite color. Every time I look at them it makes me happy. :) He also gave me a lovely little silver and gold heart necklace. It's prettier and shinier than in the picture. I love it!
So I am feeling pretty content today. Love you all, and hope you're having a great day!

Happy Valentines Day!

The Power of God's Love

Yes I have been thinking about love a lot. That's kind of funny since Valentines day is coming up. :) Well one time I stumbled upon a quote that I really liked. It goes like this:

"Trying to find lasting love without obeying God is like trying to quench thirst by drinking from an empty cup—you can go through the motions, but the thirst remains."
John H. Groberg - 2004 Oct. Gen. Conf

I have applied it to my own life in a few instances, just as I have done today. When going through hard times it is really good to be reminded that God is the source of all love, and that he will never fail. Therefore, true love will never fail.

I decided to look up the entire talk today, and I love it. I would recommend reading the entire talk. Here are a few of my favorite parts:

"What is it about true love that touches every heart? Why does the simple phrase "I love you" evoke such universal joy?

Men give various reasons, but the real reason is that every person who comes to earth is a spirit son or daughter of God. Since all love emanates from God, we are born with the capacity and the desire to love and to be loved. One of the strongest connections we have with our premortal life is how much our Father and Jesus loved us and how much we loved Them. Even though a veil was drawn over our memory, whenever we sense true love, it awakens a longing that cannot be denied.

Responding to true love is part of our very being. We innately desire to reconnect here with the love we felt there. Only as we feel God's love and fill our hearts with His love can we be truly happy."

"When filled with God's love, we can do and see and understand things that we could not otherwise do or see or understand. Filled with His love, we can endure pain, quell fear, forgive freely, avoid contention, renew strength, and bless and help others in ways surprising even to us."

Isn't that wonderful?!
I have been writing in my journal almost every day, and I really think it has opened up doors of inspiration for me. Including this one. When you are ready to receive revelation it comes. I know that that is true. I have been more clear minded, and have had questions answered. And when I am feeling discouraged and I just go and put all of my thoughts down in my journal it helps me organize my craziness, and suddenly I feel much better and more ready to handle life. So please: Keep a journal!
This website really helps me. Of course I have a hard time being persistent sometimes, but I have found that I really like doing it this way. When I am already on the computer doing whatever, it is easy to use. ldsjournal.com
But find whatever works for you, and just do it. Even if you just carry around a little notebook and write down thoughts whenever they come to you. I promise you'll be blessed for it. :D

Sweet eighteen!

Yep! I am eighteen years old. I am so old! I don't feel much different, other than I suddenly feel all of this pressure to figure out what comes next in life, and making sure I get it done successfully. But I know that all I can do is do my best, and trust the Lord to help me. :) I just have to remember to remain calm, and stay cheerful.
Quite honestly, it just feels really good to know that I am eighteen. That I have hit that mark. I have made it through eighteen years of living in this world! And I'm still doing fine.

My mom made me a memory book with note and pictures from my friends and family. I love it. It is the perfect gift for an 18th birthday. My Aunt Kris (love you!) wrote this scripture with her note to me. And it is one of my favorites now!
"I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your heart, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up." ~ D&C 84:88

~ Music ~

I am listening to some really beautiful music right now! Lovely music is one of the best things for us I think. It can speak to us like nothing else. I have been listening to a lot of peaceful music lately. Especially piano music. Piano is amazing. I am so glad I decided to learn it, and even more glad that there are people ten times better than me or more to create beautiful music for me to enjoy! I have a lot of friends that are musically talented. Most of them much more talented than me. It makes me kinda jealous, but I admire them.
Choir has been fun lately too, although kind of challenging much of the time. Our teacher expects us to do our best, and he gets frustrated when we aren't doing it right. The songs we are singing are all really great, but kind of hard. There is one really pretty one that is written in Latin. It's fun.

When I am mad or upset sometimes I listen to loudish music. When I am energetic I listen to fun upbeat music. When I feel peaceful and inspired, or when want to feel that way, I listen to soft flowing music. And, of course, when I want to chase something out of my mind, I sing or or play or listen to a hymn.
Of course, as with everything, there is a bad side to music. There is music that harms us, or even just distracts us. But if we avoid that kind then music becomes something wonderful. I think of the times when I am feeling things that can't be expained with words. When I am in a beautiful place, when I am with people I love and I can feel the love they all have, when I am feeling grateful for things I have been blessed with, or when I am just happy to be alive. Those things that you simply can not communicate merely through our simple language, I think to some extent you can communicate through music. I like to think that those feelings hint at our divine nature, so of course our finite selves can't express them. But music is something a little higher, if it is used the right way.
It apeals to our senses and speaks to our souls.
I really like the scripture in the Doctrine and Covenants where the Lord is tlaking to Emma Smith. She has been called to organize the hymn book (that sounds like a cool calling), and this is one things He says to her:

For my soul delighteth in the
song of the heart; yea, the song of
the righteous is a prayer unto me,
and it shall be answered with a
blessing upon their heads.
(Doctrine and Covenants 25:12)

That's a Mastery Scripture actually. It's one that has realy stuck in my mind.

I guess I have said enough, and I can't think of anything else to say anyway. Hehe, just some crazy thoughts from me.
Oh yeah,

Happy Valentines Day! <3
To everyone I love!

ps notice the playlist I posted, those are a few of my favorite pretty songs. :)