Baby Fever.

Photo From:sidebysideblog.blogspot.com

Ok. So I have Baby Fever really bad. And I know I can't have a baby yet, so this blog post is a way to let it out and get over it. Or at least help. :D

Step one. I am confessing! I have had this secret obsession for quite a while and it's only getting worse. I have even outright denied it when Jordon teased me about my favorite names list he found on my laptop. Maybe if I tell him I am baby crazy he will help me get over it. And writing it here may help as well. 

To be honest I started having slight baby fever probably like a year ago. Since then it comes and goes. But for the past probably two months I have had it really bad. Definitely more potent than ever. The prospect of getting married and the realization that I would actually be able to have one probably got it started. And then after I actually was married it got worse. THEN my sister-in-law announced that she is pregnant with Jordon and my first niece/nephew and that probably had the biggest impact. I can't describe how excited I am for this baby, and how much it makes me want my own. 

I see pregnant women and babies everywhere. My new ward is full of them. And I stare as I walk past baby departments in stores. I dream about being a mother all the time. Usually it's a girl, just big enough to sit up. And often times I am being very protective of her. 

But as much as I really want to be a mommy I also know I really DON'T want it. And here's why. Step two of getting over baby fever: talk about why I don't want it.

#1 To be a good mother I have to learn to be a good wife first, and although I am starting to get used to it I haven't gotten the hang of it yet. If I want someone to take care of a husband definitely works. Although that provides a more annoyed than satisfied feeling. And maybe I would feel that way about a baby as well.

#2 I am still a newlywed. This part of my life will never happen again. I want to enjoy it all the way before a child takes it away from us. I love being a family of two. Just me and my boy in our peaceful apartment. <3

#3 I don't even get how insurance works yet, or how to go about figuring out my student loans. I definitely am not ready to handle worrying about all those hospital bills and baby care fees. And although I think we would be able to handle it, I am still learning how to keep the grocery bill at a reasonable number with a husband who thinks money is made to be spent and not saved.

#4 I am not physically ready for it. I don't exercise, and I want to be more active and fit before I get pregnant. I know that I would be able to get back in shape pretty well, but I am still not ready for those kinds of body changes. I fear stretch marks, and changed shoe sizing, and a belly pouch. I don't want to share my body with an infant. And I don't want to go through the work of birthing one either.

#5 I am not mentally or emotionally ready for it. The very idea of pregnancy freaks me out in a way that I can't handle quite yet. I don't feel mature enough to be a mom and make decisions that will affect the health and well-being of a child that is my responsibility. I am not ready to give up what I am now and become also a mother. That can never be undone. I don't trust doctors, especially around here. I am very private, careful, and concerned about my body and it's care. I think birth and pregnancy have been made too medical when they should be more natural, but I am not brave enough to either do things differently or to get over it. Some days I am overwhelmed just by having to do the dishes, cook dinner, and fold laundry. And although I like the idea of being a young mother, I feel too young to be a mother. 

#6 And very importantly: Although I know he would be a great father, Jordon does not think so, is not ready to be, and does not want to be ready to be a dad. I kind of wonder if I could coax him into it. . . . I know he likes babies, and honestly he mentions them quite often, and will occasionally change his set baby name choices. (He only ever has one or two favorites, while I have like ten). I can see him becoming connected with Future Baby when he chooses a name for her. But although I could probably/maybe get him to do it, it wouldn't be fair to him. Not yet.

So those are my reasons not to have a baby. And they seem pretty persuasive for me. Step three I think should probably be to find a friend or relative with a baby and do a little babysitting. Also I think I should just let myself obsess, read pregnancy blogs, research the best pregnancy and baby care books, and add to my Pinterest "baby" board. Maybe it will help satisfy the hunger or burn it out.

So yeah I am crazy. Go ahead and think so, I don't mind. 

Women, what are your baby fever experiences? Am I weird?

As of now. I still really want a baby!

First Ten Days

     I am now a married woman! Haha. :) Jordon and I have been married for ten days. It's still totally weird. But awesome. We haven't really gotten into any kind of routine yet. We have been on a crazy eating and sleeping schedule that started the first day of our honeymoon, and has continued into the past few days of being home. But today was Jordon's first day back to work, so hopefully that will get things changing. 

     I don't have a job right now, but I'll be looking for one soon. Today I got up with Jordon, and then went back to bed for a while after he left. I had planned on sleeping for about an hour more before cleaning up the apartment, making some kind of treat, and then relaxing in a bubble bath with a book. I ended up sleeping about three more hours, taking a short bath before breakfast, doing the dishes, wiping down the counter and stove, and polishing our cherry wood table. After that I lost interest in cleaning and got distracted by looking for a good beginner knitting book online. I am going to learn to knit. :) 

     The apartment is very messy right now. We still haven't managed to put away everything from the wedding, and I am having a hard time deciding on places to put my own things as well. But it's slowly getting better. When it's all done and clean I will take some pictures. But for now the few pictures below will have to do.

 First of all, rather than using a book for a guest sign in at the reception, Jordon and I painted this piece of art together and just had everyone sign it. We had a little book as a backup because I wasn't sure if we would run out of room on here. Now we will actually see the messages instead of shoving a book to the back of a shelf to add clutter.

      This is my writing box. I have written quite a handful of thank you notes already. I like writing notes and letters to people, but I admit that this is hard. Especially because, although we did our best to write everything down, there are many gifts we can't place with a person and persons we can't place with gifts. So, to anyone deserving of a note that does not receive one: I apologize, and you should know that we both very much appreciate every gift we were given.

      This is a self portrait of me writing out some notes in our sunshiny living room.

     And just for fun, here is the view of the baptist church we can see across the street.  I have been loving the weather here lately. It has been warm and a mixture of overcast/rainy and sunshine.

     I haven't taken many picture the past week, but hopefully this scattered handful of photo's will give you a little glimpse into my life at present. And when our wedding photos are finished I will be sure to post a few here.

Photography

     Hello and good Wednesday evening everyone. As many of my posts are, this one is likely to turn out  a little random. Firstly I just realized that I have been blogging since I was 15. And I am still using the same blog. How weird is that? I should go back and read some posts to remember what was worth blogging about at 15.

     I have decided to start participating in my fabulous Aunt Kris' monthly photography club. First of all I love my aunt and I think it would be nice to support her. But most essentially I love taking as well as looking at beautiful photos, and it will give me an excuse to be more creative. I am always looking for excuses to be creative.

     Anyways. That's her button at the top of the page. The photo I used was of my birthday cake from a couple of posts ago. Yes it's a mobile phone picture and the quality isn't the best. But I think it turned out nice and I have been liking it all month so I think it was a good choice. I will try to take a better one next month.

     Maybe I will take one of my bridal bouquet. I finished it two days ago, along with Jordon's boutonniere. Yep I made them both! I am quite pleased with them both. I will post pictures of them soon. I don't know if I will use one for my monthly photo though. Haha. Because my wedding is next month and I am bound to take a photo related to that which will be my favorite. Right? We'll see.

     I am getting married in 9 days. Weird. I am so so SO SO so SOOOOOO SO excited! I'm glad I have so much to keep me busy every day or I would go crazy with anticipation.

     Well I guess I managed to keep this post somewhat fluent. :)

Goodnight!

Sending Invitations

 

I know I have been posting a lot, and that these details don't mean much to anyone but me really, but posting here relaxes me. The picture above is a stack of announcement/invitations I sent out today. Putting these together was actually fun for me. Choose favorite pictures for favorite people, stuff remaining pictures in remaining envelopes. Stick on address stickers and stamps, seal with damp sponge. Yes I typed the addresses onto stickers. It was a pain to figure out and type up, but much quicker than hand-writing. I know it's more formal and nice to hand-write them, but I didn't. Trust me stickers are a good idea. Although I did hand write a few, and that kind of made me wish I would have handwritten all of them because they looked so nice. But I stand by my sticker decision. 

If you get a hand-written one then feel special, because they are rare. :D And I think I have cute handwriting. 

Also, if I missed you are sent you two, I apologize. Keeping all the people and invitations organized is harder than I thought it would be. 

In case you have been in suspense over it, I do have my dress back. It is hanging in my closet wear I can see it whenever I look over (I don't have a closet door). And it is perfect. I LOVE all of the alterations. It fits perfect. And no it didn't cost a fortune. Happy bride! Thank you to Allyse's Bridal and their lovely seamstress and staff.

Jordon and I are going to the Draper Temple tomorrow to recieve our endowments. As mentioned in the last post I am very happy and excited about this. But today I am also really nervous. I hope I don't forget anything, and that there isn't some kind of unexpected crisis. And my nails are painted a dark purple that is ugly and chipped, and every time I look at my hands I feel a little more stressed because I know I need to fix those nails before tomorrow. Yeah, I'm crazy. 

On a more optimistic note I love my temple dress and it's super comfy. :) And it's the kind of style that makes me feel like a pioneer sister. Haha! 

Oh my goodness I am getting so stressed lately. But at the same time I am happy and excited. My life is just crazy right now. My mind is constantly going. Thinking about all the things I need to get done. 

Above all right now I am looking at the mess in my room as I type this thinking about how I need to clean, sort, and pack it all away. Oh and do laundry before tomorrow and make sure I have a really nice outfit ready to wear to the temple.

Pancackes.

     Hello. :) Just a short post to show you a couple of things. #1 I made cinnamon pancakes for breakfast today. :D I also dipped a few apples slices in the batter and fried them up that way. I don't know if most people would like them but I did. Yummy! I want to try it with banana slices next time. They are a little brown because I used half wheat flower and half white.

     And #2 I found this letter in my stuff the other day. It's from my cousin Travis, who has been one of my great friends since we were tiny.. Haha! Good times. 

In a writing mood.

     Hello readers. I just feel like writing so I am giving you a little update. First of all my 20th birthday was last month. So for those of you who didn't know how old I am, there you go. I was actually out of town to get my dress fitted (more on that to come) on my birthday, so I didn't get to spend it with Jordon as I had planned. But after we cam home my mom made me a lemon poppy-seed cake, which is my traditional birthday cake. About a week later Jordon set up a little gathering with his family to celebrate as well, which was really fun. :) 

     I really love Jordon's family a ton, and I already feel like they are my family. They have no idea how much I love them and how much help and strength they give me. <3 

     How does it feel to be 20? Not much different than any other age. Except now I think "Wow and I thought hitting 18 was weird". How did I turn into an adult? I still feel like a little girl. 

     I mentioned getting my dress fitted. They make you give them three weeks to work on it, and I get it back next weekend. I can't describe to anyone who doesn't get it how nervous I feel when I think about my dress now. I have been worried and obsessed over it ever since I left the seamstress. I know she is a professional, but still. What if I regret the way I had her do it? And what if it costs a fortune!?

     One of my bestest friends, Kaileen, came over to the apartment the other day to make some paper flowers with me. She was awesome at it. And we talked Jordon into making just one. He complained the whole time, but seemed to be proud of the resulting flower. :) Then Kai, Jordon, my brother Cody and I spent the day playing video games, watching that new Hugh Jackman movie, eating a lasagna that I made (Heck yes! Jordon got some real food.), and goofing off. Good day.

     The closer the wedding gets the more I want to be with Jordon all the time. I have to be near him, talking to him, Facebook/photo stalking, or frequently texting him all the time. I seriously can't stand being apart from him right now. I am not really sleeping well either, and hardly at all anymore. And I am sort of going crazy I think. I toss around in my little bed thinking about the excellent queen sized one he is sleeping on in our apartment, and knowing that if he was just next to me I would be sleeping fine. And when I talk about him to myself or think about him I always think "husband" instead of boyfriend or fiance. It's totally natural and not forced at all. (: I am so ready to marry him.

     We are going to the temple soon. We chose the Draper Temple for our endowments. Thinking about that is just kind of surreal. I don't know what I am thinking or feeling at all except that I am excited, and happy to have the blessing of the temple in my future.

     Oh by the way my earrings came. The ones from my last post. I love them. :) They are like amazing little green icicles. Haha! I am a jewelry/makeup/girlishness addict. And I love my unique style. Jordon is always commenting about how my hair, makeup or clothes look weird or something, but I know he secretly likes it too.

     I was going to try not to take a nap today so that I would sleep better tonight. But I slept for over an hour after church. Haha! It felt great.

     Oh and I haven't had a job since Halloween. (: Yep. Honestly I really don't want a job. I like not working. Yeah I am lazy. But it makes me feel bad for Jordon, and I know I need a job. :/ The ones I really wanted didn't want me though, and I really don't know where to look. Stupid small town!

     Anyways. I have enjoyed writing this. And I am curious to post it and see if it really is as long as it looks in draft form. :D It probably is. Sorry about that.


UPDATE 2/29/2012: Hello! Just want to mention a follow up post related to the cake photo here. Here it is: http://tiffprincess.blogspot.com/2012/02/photography.html

Officially Fall

     Hello everyone. :) It is officially Fall now, and I just wanted to do a little post in honor of it.

I put some pretty grass in a vase. I thought it looked nice and harvest-like.

 

The pumpkins and squash are getting bigger.

I made a set of little clay pumpkins to put on my vanity.

And just for fun here is a picture of me wearing black lip gloss. Yes black. It doesn't really look black on my lips, but it does look more dramatic in real life. I bought it so that I could darken some of my lipsticks when I feel like a different shade.

And that's all for today. :) Now I need to go to bed because I have to work in the morning. :P I hate my job.

Don't want to go to bed.

Hello. It's late and I'm a bit tired. But I feel like I haven't really done anything useful today so I can't go to bed yet. Silly yes. I am just going to ramble a bit about some randomness. :D

       1st of all I took these pictures with my phone and edited them on the computer. I am a bit addicted to makeup (I have to stay away from the makeup aisle or I WILL buy something), and I am very addicted to lipstick. I have a lot of lipstick, but I always want more. Lip-gloss is nice too. At first I would just gravitate towards bright colors. I still do mostly, after a job interview where I realized I had nothing appropriate for my lips I went and bought a pink lipstick (in the picture). I realized it was quite lovely, and since then have acquired a few more pinks and neutral peachy shades.

      Number 2. Online shopping is dangerous. I have learned not to browse, because then I just feel sad when I have to force self-control on myself.

     3rd. I suck at studying. I have a test tomorrow that I haven't studied for enough. Oh well. I am a pretty good test taker. Unless it's math. I am bad at anything at all math-ish. I am also really good at procrastinating. That's a weakness I am working on.

     4th. My boyfriend has been posting some very nerd videos on youtube lately. And I actually really like watching them . . . Yeah. 

     Number 5. I <3 fall. Pumpkins, orange, harvest, spice, . . . . All Fall related things have been going to my head lately, because I can feel Fall drawing closer and it excites me. I actually bought a lipstick (thus the lipstick musing above) called "pumpkin pie" because of the name. I like the color of course, but if it had been named something different it's likely I would have picked another shade.

     6. I thought there was a number 6 but now I can't think of what it might have been. I guess that's a sign that it really is time for bed. :) 

Goodnight.

<3 Tiffany Alaine

Alma 47, 48 & 49

(I decided to split my post in to two halves. So here is the second. See last post for the entire thing. Or don't, because each half stands fine on it's own.

****************

     Now I am just going to share some thoughts from what I read today. I had a lot of thoughts, but there are only a couple particular ones that I want to share.

     Alma 47. Amalickiah, the very wicked ex-Nephite (right?) is very sneakely getting control of the Lamanite kingdom.

• The first obvious lesson from this chapter is, that evil is very persistent. We must always be on our guard, and pray for strength to fight it. 
• And the devil "poisons by degrees" (vs 18). He is subtle. He is like Amalickah. He flatters, he lies, he tries the same thing over and over until you break, he acts like he's your friend when he is your enemy. In short, he is very dangerous.

•      In order to be safe from him, we must do as Moroni did in chapters 48 and 49. We need to fortify! Build walls, dig trenches, send backup to the weakest areas. OR pray and read scriptures, go to church and write a journal, work on talents you do have and ask the Lord to help you develop the spiritual gifts that you want/need but don't have. 

     One more thought. In 47:6 and in 49:13 it mentions something about the determination of the Lamanties. But each time it is for a very different reason. In the first the were determined that they would not be forced to go against the Nephites, and in the second the were determined that they would destroy the city of Noah and the Nephites there.
     There is something interesting there about human nature. Humans tend to be very stubborn. We think we know what we want and then basically swear to die before ever changing our minds.

• However #1, if you let him Satan can sway even the most determined into doing exactly the opposite of what they had intended.

• And #2, you can be determined for good or for evil and it is completely your choice. But you had better know why you are so determined and think about the consequences, both good and bad. Remember to be humble and willing to let God strengthen you when you are right and teach and correct you when you are wrong or do not fully understand.

     Well I hope I have effectively communicated what I have meant to. Enjoy my novel and have a wonderful day! Whether you already are or you aren't, go pray and read your scriptures and I promise it will be better. :)

I (heart) the scriptures.

     The scriptures are amazing. On days when I feel like despairing there is nothing that is better for me than deciding to read my scriptures.
     On such days I will usually sit there with the book in my lap for some minutes before actually opening it to read. It's like if I open it I am resolving to try and be better and happier; and that takes some effort when in a miserable state of mind. After I finally open it I at first read a bit halfheartedly and don't fully understand anything I am reading. Especially if it has been a while since I have read.

     However, after about ten minutes something miraculous happens. Even if the words still aren't completely sinking in, I suddenly feel at peace. Even on the days when I think it is impossible to feel that peace, I feel it. As soon as this dawns on me I start putting in a little more effort. I pull out a scripture marker, and maybe even a notebook. After about twenty-five minutes or more I am actually enjoying what I read. I am marking things, writing notes, and drawing parallels all over the place. And when I am done I don't just feel peaceful, I feel refreshed and strengthened. 

     I don't mean to make is sound like reading the scriptures is always a struggle for me. On happier days it comes easy and just fills me to the brim. On hard days it does take more effort. When you are not feeling spiritual then trying to do anything that is spiritual always takes effort. You have to convert yourself from one mindset to the other. From worldly cares to higher thoughts. And when you are willing to show the Lord that you are trying then He will open up to you and give you more than you imagined you could even receive.
     Oh yes, and no matter what mood I am in I always pray before I read my scriptures. Whether it is long or short I know it helps. Because of course they go hand in hand. I pray for understanding and a desire to read and learn, and to love the scriptures.

     What I am trying to say is: The scriptures are amazing. And I don't know why I ever have to think twice before turning to them. Human weakness really doesn't make any sense.


<3 Tiffany Alaine

To be continued in next post.

Kool-Aid Hair

Hello! My sister and I had a little fun today and dyed our hair. With Kool-Aid! I dyed some of the ends of hers, and just one strand of my own. I took these pictures with my cell phone not my camera, but they're pretty good I think. These are the flavors (colors) we chose. I just mixed three packets with a tiny bit of water and some hair conditioner.

 The blue looked fantastic, but we were a little concerned with the way the "purple" looked. After the hair was dyed it ended up looking pretty much the same as the blue. :/

 Before we started.

 She has very long hair, and is going to cut it soon.

 BLUE!

 

 Here is her hair after I was done and her hair was wrapped in foil.

 And dying my own. I didn't do it all the way up to the root. Just to where you can see in this pic.

We let it sit for 3 or 4 hours and then carefully rinsed out the mixture. After letting it dry a bit I also went over it with a straightener.

It actually turned out pretty well. Chey definitely has some blue hair, but it isn't too crazy. And mine has a nice subtle splash of color. And it smells delicious! It's too late to take pictures of the results tonight, but I will do that tomorrow. Thanks for sharing our adventure. :)

UPDATE (12/14/2011): I don't remember perfectly but I think this lasted about a week for us. Follow up post HERE.

An Evening on the Mountain

     I told Jordon that we need to do more fun things before he leaves, and he told me to think of ideas and then we would do them. My first idea was to go up the canyon behind my house to roast hotdogs and marshmallows. We decided to invite Cody to come along. We ate lots of junk food (at least I did) and just enjoyed it. I took a lot of pictures and the boys had fun playing in the water. I already posted them all on Facebook, but I still wanted to blog some favorites.

Cream Soda.

Ladybug & bluebells.

Strange brother. He started drinking because I was taking a pic.

Jordon and I.

Winding road.

Some Things That I Like

     Hey everyone! I just want to post a few random things. First of all as you probably saw on my Facebook (if you are my friend) I gave myself winged cat eye liner today. I have always liked winged eyeliner, but for some reason I haven't ever done it on myself. Well yesterday when I was at Jordon's house and was wearing heavier eyeliner than usual he told me that sometime for fun I should wear "egyptian" eyeliner. So today I tried it. I will of course have to do it sometime when I am actually going to see Jordon, so he can see it properly. But anyways I wore it with gold eyeshadow and some red lip gloss and I really liked it. :)

Cat Eyes

     Also here is my nerdy little robot necklace that I have been wearing the last few days. Yes I admit that I am a little bit of a nerd. I love my little robot.

Little Robot

      I also like nerds. Which explains this next picture. I love him too. Even more than the robot. :D I just really like this picture for some reason. And just in case he reads this: Jordon, hi! Yep I stole your picture and posted it on my blog. What a girl thing to do right? So what!

Jordon at Yosemite

      Just wait until I have a camera. I will be posting tons of pictures!

     Oh and I have to speak on Sunday, and wasn't given a topic. I am having a hard time knowing where to start to start. And I almost just put wear instead of where. ???

     Have a happy week people!

Fun Weekend

     Hello everyone. :) Just a quick update. First of all after a week in Yosemite my boyfriend is home, and we spent a lovely Memorial Day together. A long weekend with no work for either of us was just too good to pass up. So we drove up to SL and spent the day goofing off in stores and playing at Boondocks. We won enough tickets to buy two giant pixistix, two fun dips, two tiny rainbow erasers, and a Chinese finger trap. Yep, we are pretty much awesome.

     We took these fabulous pictures with our phones. He is squinting, but I still like the picture. By the way I need to buy a camera. Does anyone have any recommendations? I want something small but good.

Jordon mini golfing

Myself mini golfing

     After all of this we ate at Burger King and headed back to our small town to hang out at Jordon's house for a while. And he gave me this cute bear key chain from Yosemite. It's arms and legs move. :D He has one too.

     Well that's how my holiday went. It was just nice to be out with my boy. How did your weekend go?

     Oh and PS, I got the job. I am now a hotel maid. Actually I think it's a motel? What's the difference? Yeah I know, it's such a glamorous job.


     Anyways, it's lunch time for me now!

My happy day up to this point.

     I am feeling pretty happy today. I don't really know what about. It's a nice day and the world is lovely. :) And I was called in for a job interview because of my impressive cover letter. I just turned in my application and hadn't even gotten to calling them back about it yet. But I guess I didn't have to! Not that it's a dazzling job or anything. Hopefully I get it. I will tell more if I do. The picture is your hint. :D

     After the interview I went to the library for a little bit. I spent time looking for books worthy to bring home with me, sitting on the couch in the reading corner to read a few pages here and there. When I finally found what I wanted I went to the front desk to check them out and found out my card is expired. But I couldn't pay for it because I didn't have cash with me. Yep, I have to pay for my library card every year because I live outside of Price. How stupid is that! So I told the woman not to hold them and that I would just find them again next time. It was a bit dissapointing, but in the long run it added to my good mood, because the library just does that for me. New books to read excite me a little. There's just something about them. Books are wholesome and happy and calming.
     Good thing we have plenty of books around the house that I still haven't read. They just aren't the ones I wanted . . .

     After that I headed to Jordon's work so that we could have lunch together. He made fun of my parking skills, but I was prepared for it. I did park pretty bad this time, haha. We went to Wingers together. It was yummy! The Wingers here has like 20 TV's on the wall. Seriously I'm not exaggerating. So It's not a very good place to talk and eat, as Jordon is always laughing at something he sees on one of the TV's. Haha. That's ok, I don't really like to talk when I eat anyways. I am a slow eater, so if I talk I never finish.

     Now I am thinking of taking a nap before finding something to read, and then finally getting to my homework. I am a procrastinator! Don't worry, I'll get it done. :)

      If you got this far, thank you for staying to read about my day so far. Have a good one yourself. <3

Joshua 3 - Have Faith Not Fear

     I know I just barely wrote a post, but I want this one to be separate, and I have to post while it's still on my mind.

     I have realized lately that I have been letting fear get it the way of my happiness. I have been worrying too much about what could happen, and letting "what-if's" get into my mind and disturb my peace. Yesterday at church one of the speakers mentioned something that struck me. She said that there are those who cling to the rod, the ones who are holding on for dear life, and there are those who hold firm to the rod. Those who cling to the rod obviously know that it is important, and are heading in the right direction. But they are afraid, and so in danger of losing their faith. Those who hold firm to the rod are confident in themselves and in the Lord. They know that there is know reason to be afraid, as long as they are holding firm. Fear is the opposite of faith, and they can not exist together. If you let fear in it will smother your faith. And likewise if you nourish your faith it will drive out the fear.

     This led me to think about the story in Joshua, when they had to carry the ark of the covenant across the Jordan River. It's a story that has always stood out to me, since the first time I read it. It is from Joshua chaper 3:

11Behold, the ark of the covenant
of the Lord of all the earth passeth
over before you into Jordan.

 12Now therefore take you twelve 

men out of the tribes of 

Israel, out of every tribe a man.

 13And it shall come to pass, as

soon as the soles of the feet of the 

priests that bear the ark of the Lord, 

the Lord of all the earth, shall rest 

in the waters of Jordan, that the 

waters of Jordan shall be cut off  

from the waters that come down 

from above; and they shall stand 

upon an ^aheap.

 14¶And it came to pass, when the 

people removed from their tents, to 

pass over Jordan, and the priests 

bearing the ark of the covenant before the people;

 15And as they that bare the ark 

were come unto Jordan, and the feet 

of the priests that bare the ark were 

dipped in the brim of the water, (for 

Jordan overfloweth all his banks all the time of harvest,)

 16That the ^awaters which came 

down from ^babove ^cstood and rose up 

upon an ^dheap very far from the city 

Adam, that is beside Zaretan: and 

those that came down toward the 

sea of the plain, even ^ethe salt sea, 

failed, and were cut off: and the people 

passed over right against Jericho.

 17And the priests that bare the 

ark of the covenant of the Lord 

stood firm on ^adry ground in the 

midst of Jordan, and all the Israelites 

passed over on dry ground, until all the 

people were passed clean over Jordan.

     What impresses me about this story is this: The priests had to get their feet wet before the waters parted for them. Can you imagine that? The prophet tells you to step forward into the water and then the water will part, and you will be able to walk through on dry ground. What must they have been thinking? Couldn't Joshua have parted the water and then told them to walk through? Nope, it was a test of faith. They had to take the first steps, and then the Lord did the rest.

     My point is, that sometimes you have to get your feet wet before the waters part. Don't just stand there and wait for things to happen before you make a move. The Lord wants us to learn to trust him. If he always just shows us that things will be fine before we even do anything then how will we learn to conquer our fears and move forward with faith? Faith isn't seeing that the waters have already parted and saying "oh it looks like it's safe to move on." Faith is trusting the Lord before we know how things will turn out.

     We need to trust the Lord, and know that if we move forward he will provide a way for us. In the end we will walk through on dry ground.

Last Days of Winter

     Hello everyone. :) Even though I don't think anyone really reads it, I have decided that I need to blog more. I'm tired of Facebook. It's fine to just kind of get a glimpse of what everyone is up to, but it's too impersonal. My blog is like my own little spotlight corner. So yes, I am going to blog more.

     

     The last few weeks of Winter always seem really long. To everyone I think. We are all so ready for Spring, and catching little bits of it here and there just makes it seem even more wonderful. So on those March and April days that are just too Wintery we tend to get a little depressed, and it seems like waiting for it to be over is just too much to handle.

     But I just started thinking, that even though I'm happy that Spring is just around the corner I need to enjoy what I have now. I know that before too long it's going to jump right to Summer (crazy Utah), and after a while I am really going to want the cool season to come back. I love Fall/Winter clothes. I love layering, and tights and knee high socks, and sweaters and scarves and boots. And really it hasn't been a very cold Winter, so I haven't even had to cover up with my coat too much. I also love the rich colors. Dark greens, chocolate browns, burnt orange, deep plum and burgundy. And suddenly I am thinking that I have not quite gotten my fill of all of these. I need to wear my tights more!
      So, although I am still awaiting Spring with wishes of warm breezes and and short skirts without cold legs, I am also willing to enjoy the kind of beauty that God is giving me right now.

    
p.s. I curled my hair yesterday, and today I am enjoying my second-day-curls. Don't you love those? It's the perfect textured and yet soft and easy style.

<3 Tiff

Unleashing the Dormant Spirit

      I'm pretty sure I have posted this before. But it was quite a while ago, and it's worth posting again. I also have a link to it at the very top of my side bar. This is so beautiful to me. It's comforting and peaceful.

Conffesions of a Messy Girl

     Hello everyone! I would like to start by letting you all know that I am one of the messiest girls that I know. I have met a few who are just as or messier than me, but not many. I always tell myself that it will be different when I move out and have my own place to take care of. I do think that that is a little true, but I need to confess to myself that it probably isn't as true as I would like it to be. So a goal I am setting now for myself is to learn how to be clean. After all, it's a Celestial trait, and I need to learn it eventually. And I want to be clean, I really do. I remember sitting in Aunt Kris' room at Grandpa's house and loving it, because it was always so fresh and feminine, with roses hanging in bundles from the ceiling. And of course perfectly organized and clean. I always thought you were amazing Kris! And still do.

     So, I came across this 20 day program to spiff up your house. I don't have my own place, but I like this. And I thought that all of you would too. So here is the link. They are videos, the first is at the bottom of the page. They range from 2-5 minutes long. The goal is to take 20 minutes every day for 20 days and do something to make your home better. Some are small things, and some will probably take longer than 20 minutes for some people (like me). This guy is obviously already really clean, so of course it only takes him 20 minutes. Or maybe he cleaned before he made the video?

     Just to give you an idea of what kind of things they are. Day one is to clean one room in your house, including completely cleaning floors and wiping down surfaces. The second days goal was just to buy some fresh flowers for your home.

     So today I am just going to start cleaning my room. It will definitely take longer than 20 minutes, and I probably won't get to vacuuming until tomorrow. :D

     And I also need to get my homework done really bad.

<3 Tiff

Christmas is coming!

     Hurray! It's always hard for me to believe when December actually comes around. And I'm always excited for it. Burdens don't seem so hard to bare in December. In fact this is the season when we take on hectic responsibilities because we want to. It's to make the holiday better! Decorating, looking for gifts, making treats . . .   I am working on making homemade Christmas gifts for my family, which I try to do every year. It's one of my favorite parts of Christmas. Gifts that you carefully think out and make yourself are just special. I think that making them does more for me than it does for the people I give them too. But I want to please the receiver as well, so I hope that everything turns out nicely this year. I do have some good ideas. I will take pictures as I go along and post them after Christmas.
     I can't say a single thing about my gift(s) to Jordon, because I don't want him getting even tiny hints. And you never know, he might decide to read my blog one day.

     I went with his family to get a Christmas tree on Sunday. We use a fake tree and I have never done that before, so it was fun. The snow was pretty deep in some places, as we trudged through it in search of a suitable tree. It was kind of tiring for my legs! I wasn't cold, even though my feet were pretty wet by the end. It was a beautiful day. After the first attempt failed and we came back to the vehicles I got a nice hot cup of coco before continuing to the next spot. I had to go extra slow through the deep spots so that I didn't spill, but it made walking much more pleasant. When the tree was selected, chopped down, and hauled back everyone had some coco and donuts before we headed back to town.
     Once we were back we watched the first presidencies Christmas devotional, then ate dinner. After that we decorated the tree while eating oreo truffles that Jordon's sister made (which my mom introduced to them last year). It was a good day. :)

     If you haven't watched the devotional yet then you need to! Yes, that's an order. :) Just kidding, but you really really should. I watched it again at home for FHE because my family missed it and mom wanted to see it. We watched it on her computer. I can't pick favorites of course and it was all good, but I loved President Uchtdorf's talk, as usual. He has such a wonderful style. I don't think I've ever heard a general authority use the story of the Grinch. The German accent makes it better as well. And I enjoyed the music more than usual.
     Go watch the 2010 First Presidency Christmas Devotional!